A man was caught by the police

A man was caught by the police: How did u kill 50 people ?

Man : I was driving my Car at 40mph, but when I tried to stop I found that I have no breaks, I saw 2 men walking in the street and a wedding going on at the other side of the street, Who should I hit ?

The police man: Ofcourse the 2 men, less damage.

Man  : Thats what I thought to myself, but when I did it, I hit only one and the other ran to the wedding, So I Went After him.

 

Read this genius engineers story!

7 Engineers and 7 Doctors are going from PUNE to Mumbai. So both groups gather at Pune Station. 

Both groups are desperately trying to prove their superiority . 

SCENE 1 (PUNE- MUMBAI): 
------------ --------- --------- -------- ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- - - 
7 engineers take only 1 Ticket and 7 doctors buy all 7 tickets.. 
Doctors are desperately waiting for TC to come...... 
When TC arrives, 
All 7 Engineers get in one toilet so when TC knocks, one hand come out with the ticket and the TC goes 

Away..... 

NOW on return Journey All of them don't get a direct Train to PUNE. So they all decide to take a Passenger till Lonavala, from there they can easily get a LOCAL to PUNE 


SCENE 2 (MUMBAI - LONAVALA): 
------------ --------- --------- ---- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ - ----------- 
Doctors decided, "this time we will prove that we too are equal"....All 7 Doctors take 1 Ticket, Engineers don't buy any ticket at all!!!!!.. 

TC arrives.... 

ALL DOCTORS IN ONE TOILET.ALL ENGINEERS IN THE OPPOSITE. 

One engineer gets out and knocks the door of Doctors toilet, One hand comes with the tickets, he takes the 
ticket and comes in Engg. Bathroom... TC DRIVES out ALL the doctors from the toilet and they are heavily fined. 


SCENE 3 ( LONAVALA): ! 
------------ --------- --------- --------- -- 
SO now both the group r on LONAVALA station. Doctors planning their move for last chance, they board the local to Pune. 

This time doctors decide that they will play the same (1 ticket) trick. 

ALL Doctors take 1 tickets...Engineers BUY all 7 tickets this time... 
SO TC Comes.. All Engineers showed their tickets ............ ....... ..... 

Doctors are still searching for toilet in the LOCAL train....... .... 


Conclusion: Technically intelligent people are geniuses, don't mess with Engineers. 

DOG LOGIC!

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. 

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. 

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. 

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. 

Dogs love their friends & bite their enemies, quite unlike people. 

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. 

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise . 

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3 a can.  That's almost $21 in dog money. 

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. 

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. 

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. 

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them. 

Some funny animal jokes!! OK, I know they're silly but you gotta laugh!! ;-)

Q: Why do hummingbirds hum?
A: Because they don't know the words.

Q: Where does a blackbird go for a drink?
A: To a crow bar.

Q: Why was the crow perched on a telephone wire?
A: He was going to make a long-distance caw.

Q: What did the chick say when it saw an orange in the nest?
A: Look at the orange mama laid.

Q: Is it good manners to eat fried chicken with your fingers?
A: No, you should eat your fingers separately.

Q: Why do hens lay eggs?
A: If they dropped them, they'd break.

Q: Why do seagulls live near the sea?
A: Because if they lived near the bay, they would be called bagels.

Q: Diner: Do you serve chicken here?
A: Waiter: Sit down, sir. We serve anyone. 

Short story with a Moral!

One day a fisherman got up very early in the morning. There was not enough sunlight to get into the sea. He saw a pack of stones to pass time. He started throwing the stone into the sea. While having the last stone in the hand, the sun came up then he saw that the stone was a diamond and all the stones he threw were diamonds as well. He felt for his misfortune of throwing all of them into the sea... MORAL OF THE STORY: BELOW * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Do not get up early in the morning....

THINK BEFORE COMMITTING TO CLIENT:-

A new vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on the door on the first house of the street. A tall lady answered the door... 

Before she could speak, the enthusiastic salesman barged into the living room and opened a big black plastic bag and poured all the cow droppings onto the carpet. 
"Madam, if I cannot clean this up with the use of this new powerful Vacuum cleaner, I will EAT all this dung!" exclaimed the eager salesman. 
"Do you need chilly sauce or ketchup with that" asked the lady. 
The bewildered salesman asked, "Why, madam?" 

"There's no electricity in the house..." said the lady. 
  
  
  
  
MORAL: Gather all requirements and resources before working on any project and committing to the client...!!!
 

"THE TOUCHING STORY!!!!!"

This is awesome. Just spend a minute reading it.

On their way back from School Arjun started talking 

Arjun : Bro! I am moving to a different city to study. I will miss you man 
Pargat: I will miss you too mate. But nothing can break our friendship. We will at least meet once every year. 
Arjun: Yes that is a deal 

and they parted with tears in their eyes... 
As time went by, both got busy with their work life. They kept their promise for two years and after that they moved on with their own lives and in the process Arjun lost his contact with Pargat. Time went by and both became Police Officers. 

Year: 2009 
Venue: The Police station where Arjun works 

Tring... Tring... 

Arjun picks up the call and he gets a pleasant surprise... 

"Is this Arjun?" 
"Yes. Who is on the line?" 
" Bro. Its Pargat! I just found out that you are posted in this station" 

Tear drops welled up Arjun's eyes 

Arjun: Where are you? 
Pargat: I am standing outside the Police station. Come Out 
Arjun: Is it? I am coming right away. 

Arjun rushed out of the Police station and saw Pargat standing outside. They were seeing each other for the first time after thirty years. He wanted to go and hug his friend. But he could not hug his friend. It was a very touching moment for both of them : 

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Have you ever seen a touching moment like this??